HOW TO ORDER A CHEESESTEAK IN PHILLY:

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When in Philly, expect your order-taker to have the manners of "The Soup Nazi". Be prepared when you place your order. Cheesesteak shops are not known for their patience and customer service. Act like you know what you're ordering, and don't hesitate while making your choices. Know your order BEFORE you approach the counter, and try and keep special requests to a minimum (but still make sure you get what you want). Ordering a cheesesteak can be traumatic in some places. So make your decisions, and be assertive. Some guys can smell a tourist a mile away. Act like you've been there a million times, talk Philly sports, and say "Yo" a lot to try and blend in with the natives. If the menu is numbered, use the number of your selection. And always specify whether or not you want fried onions by saying "Wit" or "Wit-out", this is the Philly way. If you are at Pat's or Geno's, and you want to try your steak with Cheez Whiz and onions, just say "Whiz, Wit"-- now that's the proper lingo!

One word of advice to visitors: Never, and I mean NEVER attend an Eagles game at The Linc wearing the opponents jersey, or you'll be in for a long day. It's okay to come and root for your team, but keep it low key and show respect. "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" applies here. Also, beware of the cheesesteaks they serve at The Linc, as of 2004 they were pathetic. But you're in good shape at Phillies games, they have the real thing out in Ashburn Alley. In all seriousness, Philly natives appear rough on the outside (especially Eagles fans on game day!). But underneath it all, most Philadelphians are friendly and proud of their roots. Philadelphians work hard and play hard. A little respect goes a long way, and you're sure to meet some really good people when you visit the Liberty Town. Just drink Yuengling Lager and eat cheesesteaks... you'll fit right in before you know it! After all, Philadelphia really is The City of Brotherly Love!